Imagine you're a teen and you've just done something really dumb like get drunk at a friend's house. Who are the last people on earth you'd want to find out? Your parents, right? You'd be in so much trouble if they did.

A safety plan gets your teen past that fear by letting him know that you care more about him than about what he does. Even if you think he already knows how you feel, spell it out for him. Then lay out your plan. Here's one way to do it:

"Nothing in the world is more important to me than keeping you healthy and safe. That's one reason I don't want you to drink or do drugs. But if you ever find yourself in a bad situation — like, you get drunk at a party, or the person who's supposed to drive you home does — I want you to call me. I don't care what time it is. I'll come to pick you up and I won't ask any questions until the next day. Will you promise to do that for me?"

What happens if your teen gets freaked out about calling you for a ride or he needs advice fast and you're not around? A wider net can help keep him safe. Ask your teen if there are any other adults he'd feel comfortable talking to or calling for a ride — a grandparent, a neighbor, a friend's parent, etc. Then find those people on his list that you like and trust, and ask if they'd be part of your "Call any time, day or night" team.

Remember, his thinking may be fuzzy when he really needs help. That's why it's a good idea to put the names and phone numbers (home, cell, and work) for each person on something he can keep handy. For instance, write them on an emergency contact card for his wallet or plug them directly into his cell phone so they're always with him.