To curb your children's substance use, you must understand it. Every one of today's adolescents has sat through countless lectures about the dangers of substance use from you, or in school classes and assemblies, the media, or DARE (Drug Abuse Resistance Education, a group with a strong elementary and middle- school presence). And every year thousands of older teens sign "prom promises" and other agreements vowing not to abuse substances. So with all this education and all these warnings, why are these dangerous substances still so appealing for teens?

There are several reasons youth gravitate toward substance use, usually beginning with alcohol, tobacco, and marijuana, and in some cases moving on to more dangerous drugs such as LSD, cocaine, Ecstasy, heroin, and other potentially lethal mixtures.

Everybody's Doing It

Teenagers are astute observers, and they see lots of people using various substances. They see their parents and other adults drinking alcohol, smoking, and unfortunately, sometimes abusing other substances too. They look at TV and magazine and see hundreds of cool ads for alcohol and tobacco products. Movies, music, internet and TV often glorify the substance-soaked nightlife of bars and clubs and make drug use look much more prevalent than it is. In a 1999 “Substance Use in Popular Movies and Music” report, 98% of movies studied depicted substance use, and 75% of rap songs mentioned substance use. In 2003, forty two percent of teens agreed that movies and TV shows make drugs seem like an ok thing to do. And most important, they usually see some other teenagers who enjoy alcohol, cigarettes, and other substances. How can it be wrong?

The teen social scene often revolves around drinking and smoking pot. That's what the word "party" means to most teenagers. Some parties, like family-sponsored birthday bashes and sweet sixteens, as well as cast parties and sport team parties, don't involve alcohol, but many “real" parties do. Sometimes friends urge one another to try a drink or smoke something, but it's just as common for teens to start using a substance because it's readily available and they observe all their friends enjoying it. Not only that, but it's a way to be social. Teens wildly overstate the number of their peers who use drugs. Peer pressure is often more of an internal thing, where teens think “my friends are doing it and I don’t want to be the only one not doing it.” One young man told me, "If I didn't drink, I wouldn't have anyone to hang out with." Teens see their friends enjoying themselves with various substances, and so they view it as acceptable. The flip side is that when their friends think that drinking is stupid or smoking pot is scary, they're much less likely to try it.
 
Escape and Self-Medication

Life is often difficult for teenagers. When they're unhappy and uncomfortable with themselves and have neither a healthy outlet for their frustration nor a trusted confidant, they may turn to chemicals for solace. Depending on what substance they're using, they may feel blissfully oblivious, wonderfully happy, or energized and confident. When they're given a chance to take something to make them feel better, many can't resist. "When I smoke up," one of my clients put it, “I can just forget about everything that's pressuring me."

After their initial exposure to a substance, teenagers start to believe it can ward off their painful feelings. It's a dangerous shortcut to solving problems, but what do they care? If their lives aren't going well, they figure they have nothing to lose. Of course, their problems don't vanish, and once the effects of the substance have worn off, they're left with the same problems as before, plus the low, depressed feelings that some substances leave you with. So these teens come back for even more of that substance. Before long, the substance takes on the role of a mood enhancer, an antidote to any unpleasant situation, and in many cases a crutch to deal with everyday life. As you'll see, any immediate benefits are short-lived.

Boredom and Instant Friends

Teens who can't tolerate being alone, have trouble keeping themselves occupied, and crave excitement are prime candidates for substance abuse. Not only do alcohol and marijuana give them something to do, but those substances help fill the internal void they feel. One boy's statement captures this sentiment. "When I'm stuck in my house with nothing to do," he said, "all I can think about is going out to party." Alcohol and drugs become false friends whose glittery promise of a good time is alluring to a bored adolescent. These false friends also help restless, bored, risk-taking teens to forget about troubles that they often face, like family conflicts, school failure, and peer rejection. Further, they provide a common ground for interacting with like-minded teens, a way to instantly bond with a group of kids. Soon the illicit substances define their existence and they spend increasing amounts of time seeking ways to get high.

Rebellion

 What better way to express anger at your parents than doing something they tell you not to? Different rebellious teens choose different substances to use based on their personalities. I’m often struck by teenagers’ lethal combination of despair and anger. Alcohol is the drug of choice for the angry teenager because it frees him to behave aggressively. One young man told me, “When we’re drinking, the rest of the world can go to hell.” Methamphetamine, or meth, also encourage aggressive, violent behavior, only can be far more dangerous and potent than alcohol. Marijuana, on the other hand, often seems to reduce aggression and is more of an avoidance drug. LSD and hallucinogens are also escape drugs, often used by young people who feel misunderstood and may long to escape to a more idealistic, kind world. Smoking cigarettes can be a form of rebellion to flaunt their independence and make their parents angry.

Instant Gratification

Drugs and alcohol work quickly. The initial effects feel really good (of course -- why else would people use substances?). It's easy to get a nicotine buzz from a cigarette, or the warm, happy feelings that come with a few drinks. Who doesn't want an easy way to be happy? Young people do -- especially unhappy young people who want to get rid of their bad feelings fast. Another teen told me, "When I get into a fight with my parents, I'm out the door. I just can't get stoned fast enough." It's a short-term shortcut to happiness. The problem is, again, that not only do any problems they were trying to avoid still exist once the happy feelings wear off, but most substances that lift you up high end up dropping you way low, so you're sadder than you were before you started. At the very least, you're back where you started emotionally, and that's not good enough for some teens.

Lack of Confidence

Many shy teenagers who lack confidence report that they'll do things under the influence of alcohol or drugs that they might not otherwise. One girl readily acknowledged this, saying, "I have to get drunk before going to a party. Otherwise, I wouldn't be able to talk to anyone.” Of course, this is part of the appeal of drugs and alcohol even for relatively self-confident teens; you have the courage to dance if you're a bad dancer, or sing at the top of your lungs even if you have a terrible voice, or kiss the girl you're attracted to. And alcohol and other drugs tend not only to loosen your inhibitions but to alleviate social anxiety. Not only do you have something in common with the other people around you, but there's the mentality that "if I do anything or say anything stupid, everyone will just think I had too many drinks or smoked too much weed." For too many teens, substances become a crutch they rely on, and they don't feel comfortable in a social setting without them. This is the kind of confidence booster they can do without. Young people who feel bad about themselves are more susceptible to substance abuse, but the false sense of security alcohol and drugs give them is short-lived. And to make matters worse, substance abuse leads its users to make poor decisions that further undermine their self-confidence in the long run.

Misinformation

Perhaps the most avoidable cause of substance abuse is inaccurate information about drugs and alcohol. After all, there are so many statistics and facts readily available to teens! But nearly every teenager has friends who claim to be experts on various recreational substances, and they're happy to assure her that the risks are minimal. Several years ago, a young man told me his definition of a drinking problem was an alcoholic on skid row. Anything short of that, even vomiting, blackouts, and passing out, was no big deal. The same is true of Ecstasy, "a totally harmless drug," marijuana -- "It's not addictive and doesn't have any kind of negative side to it" -- and any other substance. It's important for you to provide accurate information and correct misconceptions, not just about the most lethal drugs like meth and heroin but about drugs like alcohol, tobacco, and marijuana, which many teens don't take seriously enough.

Parents' Cues

Sometimes parents inadvertently encourage their children to use alcohol or other substances, when we don’t recognize what powerful role models we are for our kids. Your condoning of occasional drinking, getting drunk yourselves, using illegal drugs, telling funny or entertaining personal stories that involve heavy drinking or drug use, or making light of the risks involved is called enabling in my line of work. This term refers to behavior that ignores or promotes an emerging problem with illicit substances. When you deny or minimize the seriousness of your teenager's actions, you're giving him subtle permission to continue.

The emotional climate in your home can also precipitate substance abuse. Inadequate parental involvement and lack of supervision put teenagers at risk. Poor family communication only worsens the problem. Teenagers who can't talk to their parents are more likely to feel isolated and unhappy, and these feelings lead them to seek chemical solutions to their problems. Finally, parents' relationships and behavior send powerful messages to their children about how to cope with problems. If they see you continually avoiding difficult issues, they'll probably do the same.

© 2001 by Neil I. Bernstein. From “How to Keep Your Teenager Out of Trouble and What to Do if You Can’t” by Dr. Neil I. Bernstein (2001, Workman Publishing, New York). Used with permission.