I run a small, family-owned business, so my employees are not only coworkers, but dear friends. Roberto is an excellent worker who can do just about anything. Besides being a good man, he is hardworking and someone who I depend on daily for the operation of my business.

I’ve known Roberto for about four years now, and I noticed he was acting a little out of character throughout the year. I knew he’d had some problems with alcohol in the past, and I was worried that he was starting to drink heavily again.

He took the Long Island Railroad to and from work everyday, and the train he rode had a bar car. The temptation was right in front of him – fellow commuters would buy him beers and I think that is how his problem started up again.

In the early spring, he wasn’t showing up for work and was giving me all sorts of excuses. He said he was under a lot of stress, trying to care for his wife and teenage kids. I could tell his life was falling apart. He was having an affair, neglecting his job and worst of all, his family. It got to the point where he wasn’t showing up to the office for days in a row. I knew something was wrong and I had to help.

I had been diagnosed earlier in the year with tonsil cancer and had gone through my own battle with my health. I felt as though God had given me a second chance at life, and I felt as though I needed to pass this along to someone else. I had begun to look at life differently, seeing the difference between problems and situations. I tried to stay away from negativity – or at least try to remedy it. In this case, I wanted to help my friend who was a person in need.

I didn’t map out a plan for what I was going to say or do for Roberto. Instead, I immediately drove straight over to his house. I walked inside to find the house in disarray and his wife and son watching TV and playing video games as if nothing was wrong. I went upstairs into Roberto’s bedroom. The shades were down and it was dark and hot; cans were lying all across the floor. Roberto was lying on the bed in a stupor, passed out drunk. I went over and shook him awake. I made him stand up at attention as if I were his drill sergeant and told him that he was going to get help and get over this problem.

When I look back on this incident, I realize that it could’ve been very dangerous.* I didn’t know how he was going to react to me walking into his house. If he were an angry drunk, he might have tried to hurt me. Luckily, Roberto respected me and the authoritative role I was taking. He knew that he was in too deep and understood that he needed to change his life.

I got Roberto into a detox program at a local treatment center and became involved with the treatment for his disease. I was there for him to confide in and I never stopped listening. Roberto had turned to alcohol because he thought he was alone and didn’t have anyone who cared. I showed Roberto that I was going to be there for him, and when he was feeling stressed or had problems, he could turn to me instead of alcohol.

I am not so involved in his treatment anymore, but he continues to talk to me, so I feel like I’m part of his therapy. Roberto seems to be doing well – he comes to work and does a good job and seems to be taking a more active role as a husband and father. I’m glad that I intervened and was able to help him change his life. Although I didn’t think my intervention through, I’m glad I took action in the way I did. If too much more time had gone by, I don’t know where Roberto would be today.

Roberto has a disease, but with the help of my friendship he has been seeing his way through it. It’s going to be a daily struggle for him, and I can only do so much to help since he is a grown man with a family of his own. He needs to believe that a sober life is a better life to beat his addiction. I truly believe that healing comes from within the soul.

*When initiating a discussion with a person with an alcohol or drug problem, experts strongly recommend to wait until the person is not under the influence of alcohol or other drugs. When people are high, they are less able to understand logic and are more likely to be impatient, dismissive, angry, and blaming. Some people have poor impulse control and may act irrationally or violently.