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Daughter Stealing Pills
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I suspect my daughter (or possibly her friends) have been stealing painkillers from my medicine cabinet. (I had surgery last fall and had several bottles of pills leftover.) What’s the best way to confront her about this?
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brian100shan | 3/30/2008 7:24 PM
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If you think your daughter and/or her friends are stealing pills, ask her and expect to be lied too. Tell her that RX drug abuse is a serious problem and that you will not accept it. Also, any leftover pills should be disposed of.
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shakamlelah | 3/18/2008 3:09 AM
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My boyfriend has told me that he is addicted to crack. I have tried to get him help before and he attended treatment, but left after a month. He was fine for a long time (at least I thought he was). Now, he is doing the same things that he was doing before and now he states that he is doing it again. I have been with him for 2 years and we have a daughter together. I really do not know what to do at this point. I want to support him and help him, but I am so tired at this point. I love this man so much. But, at what point do I say enough is enough? Or do I?
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olythebaby1 | 3/11/2008 4:45 PM
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Go and talk to her mom and tell her what is happening. Maybe together you both can come up with something that will help the daughter. I was on drugs for 20 years, this stuff is killing people. It sounds like you love your stepdaughter and sometimes tough love is what we have to do. I have a 24 year old daughter who is doing every type of drug you can think of, and the hardest thing I had to do was put her out of my house. As a mother, I worry. But as a recovering alcoholic and drug addict, I understand. Today, I thank God for the person that did for me what I couldn't do for myself because I didn't know any better. Help your stepdaughter even though she will not see it that way right now . GOOD luck and GOD bless. Read my book, "One Sista"s Pain and Glory" at www.rosedogbooksstore.com. It is a true story about me . I hope it helps.
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goofydr | 3/8/2008 9:19 PM
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Steve, I agree with your advice to this parent 100 percent. My parents did that to my sister almost 12 years ago while she was in high school. She was having some problems in school; lying, having sex with boys we didn't know, stealing, had odd behavior, and all around pain to the whole family. She kept denying ever taking drugs, but my parents took her to our family doctor for a drug test anyway. She was crying the whole time and continued to say that she wasn't taking drugs. We were all surprised that the drug test came up negative. It was a great experience for the whole family. She felt empowered by this experience, and more importantly she was referred to a counselor and she worked through some issues that she felt were the reasons for her bizarre behavior. I think every parent should drug test their kids. Especially, if they are at the age when they are out on their own and have their driver's license.
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goofydr | 3/8/2008 9:04 PM
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In Reply To: Boyfriend lying about prescription drug use...
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I take prescription drugs and I abuse them too. I know how hard it is for me to follow the rules and the instructions given to me from my dr. I don't have a fraction of a percentage of problems that your boyfriend is displaying. He's not even getting the meds from a dr. He's committing a felony with the drugs he's taking. My advice to you would be to leave him; don't let him know where you are, and don't contact him or allow him to contact you through anyone. I think you should cut him out of your life. Leave unannounced, but do him one last favor- leave as many pamphlets about his disease and how he can contact services in his area that he can get help from. He needs treatment and he won't get it if you continue to be in his life. You also sound like an intelligent woman and you deserve to have a man in your life who values you and your future together. It may take a while, but it has to be healthier then the situation that you are in at the moment. Good luck.
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kharder1207 | 2/29/2008 11:53 AM
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Hi. I am writing here so that maybe someone can offer some help or advice. I have been with my boyfriend for over two years now. Last year, he was introduced to prescription drugs, mainly RoxyCodone (very similar to OxyContin). He also would take vicodin, percocet, and anything he could find just to 'relax' or 'party.' Most of this was done in the presence of his friends. I didn't mind it at first because it didn't really affect him or our relationship. Well as the usage continued, he changed drastically. He became very emotional, depressed, angry. Mainly with the Roxy pills, when on them he would all of a sudden become very touchy-feely. He would become very happy, but as soon as something negative came into play, he would flip out. He would be very fussy, almost like a child. The pills seemed to cause very high highs, and very low lows. Our sex life would be affected. When on the pills, he would get very sexual, but it was short lived because he couldn't perform while on the pills. This would be followed by an episode of anger and fighting. We would fight all the time, usually about the pill usage. He would threaten suicide, cut himself, lock himself in the bathroom for hours.
Finally I put my foot down and said that I wouldn't stand for this anymore. We had a talk and he said that he realized that the pills were causing too many problems. He said he realized he was hurting himself and us. So he agreed to stop. He promised never to touch the pills again. I was so relieved and proud of him. But what seemed like a blessing shortly ended. I started noticing the same things I had noticed before. The emotional distress, the fussiness, the sudden change in moods, and mainly the problems in the bedroom. This was almost always a key factor because we NEVER had a problem in that area. But when he was on pills, nothing worked. I addressed this problem with him over several occasions. I tried talking with him but he would always deny ever taking pills. I started becoming more cautious and aware of the situation. I would look through his things and find rolled up dollar bills (he always snorted the pills). I found residue on counter tops. I found cellophane wrappers with small pieces of blue pills inside. So finally after 6 months of me pointing the finger, and him denying, I left. I said that I knew he was lying, that I loved him, but that I couldn't do it anymore. I moved to another state to be with family. We kept in contact but would continue fighting over the situation, because for a while he would still deny my accusations. But within a few weeks of us being apart he started to break down. He started to admit everything I had already known. He admitted to lying so many times. He said that it just got to be too much and that he couldn't get out of the lies because he had lied so much. He moved to his mother's to get away from all his friends who were using. He eventually moved in with me and we were going to start over. Fresh and new.
Well it had been 2 months since he moved with me, we decided to move back in with his mom. We have only been here 2 weeks now. He decided to go see his old friends one night and took a pill. An Oxy he says. He said it was only once and he was going to be honest with me about everything. He says he has things under control. It only caused a fight. So he again said he would never touch the pills again. But last night he had a friend come over. And this is a friend I know uses, same friend he saw last week. I think I saw signs of the pill usage. He knows I don't agree with it, and I really think he may be lying again. He only denies it when I bring it up or try to discuss it with him. He just gets so angry and defensive. He does a really great job of turning it around and making me look bad. So I'm at a point where I am afraid to say something, not sure what to say, and feeling like I am a fool.
Someone please help with advice!
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47becci | 2/22/2008 11:11 PM
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My 22 year old son is in jail for stealing my car for the 2nd time. He was due to go to a rehab that morning and he panicked but I had to report my car stolen to protect myself. He called 2 hours later and turned himself in. He keeps asking to have charges dropped and he will go to rehab. He says he realizes he is going to die if he doesn't get help. I don't know what to do because it is real hard to believe anything he says .But, I know he probably would do better in a long term rehab than in jail. Plus, does he really need a felony charge on top of dealing with an addiction. He has caused so much stress on my family. I have a 13 year old that is really angry and doesn't want to live at our home anymore. If anyone has some good advise please reply. I don't want to bury my son!!
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sportgirl101010 | 2/22/2008 2:24 AM
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In Reply To: Daughter addict for 9 years
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Your story brought tears to my eyes because it reminded me of my own daughter 2 years ago. My DAUGHTER was addicted to perocets and different pills, and also smoking weed. She has stolen from us and pawned from our house. I also took her to different doctors and they put her on anti depressions. It got worse. I finally kicked her out, and cried every night for 2 weeks. She came back and swore she would go to a program and be tested for drugs daily. Well once again she failed. Finally one doctor put her on a methadone program for 15 days. She did great, but then turned up pregnant. Well that was the good news, because she never took a pill after she found out. She went through withdrawal from the antidepressants and the methadone for weeks. She wouldn’t even take an Advil. The baby is now 5 months and life is good. She has so much remorse. But I would advise you to try a methadone program, it really helped her. Good luck.
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Xochitlm | 2/12/2008 2:42 PM
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I have been talking to my children about drugs all of their life and I just found out that my 17 year old son has been using marijuana. I feel devastated. I have an appointment to talk to a drug and alcohol counselor. I am afraid.
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mashathepotatoes | 2/6/2008 7:13 PM
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My seventeen year old daughter has everything going for her; good family, good job, looks, smarts, charm, you name it. Her experimentation with drugs and crime at 15 landed her in state custody and 6 months of lockup, with a heavy load of requirements to follow, including drug testing, group sessions, electronic monitoring etc. None of DYS efforts is working or helping her, as she keeps re-offending and getting recommitted. She's in for 4 months this time, and the system admits they don't have the treatment available to address her substance abuse and is only holding her on timeout for her own safety. Can you recommend a few good self help books for her. Just general life help stuff.
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